“Let go!” the technician yelled, raising his open hands high. “Turn loose of the wheel!” Yesterday I drove through one of those car washes where you drive into a track and the car is pulled through the wash. I did as he instructed, realizing that I hadn’t been through one of those in many, many years and I’d forgotten how it works. “Neutral!”  “Neutral!” he yelled instructing me to put the car in the neutral gear to be pulled along by the carwash track mechanism.

As the soap and huge brush-like sheets covered my car I could not see out at all. I was alone in my car, being pulled along by an unseen force unable to see where I was going as a storm of soap, water and brushes lashed against my car. I was not guiding the car. No one appeared to be, yet it was moving forward. I felt anxious. I recognized that what I felt was a total lack of control.

I realized that the past few years of my life had been like that. Going through the illness and death of my husband then having my house on the market with no control over if or when it would sell or for what price, not knowing where I would be moving to or what my new life would be; I felt as though I was being pulled through a series of life’s storms without being able to see even a step ahead of me or having control over the situation.

“Let go!” I learned that I had to let go of the need to know what was next. I learned to trust that whatever it was I would have the strength and resources to handle it.

“Turn loose of the wheel!” I learned that while I’ve always believed that we need to plan, prepare and design the life we want, there are things we cannot control and times that we need to just let go of trying to steer the circumstances.

Faith. I learned the true meaning of faith. When you can’t see and can’t control your situation trusting that some unseen force outside of you—call it God, Fate or Spirit of the Universe—is in control and you’ll come through the crisis.

You will come out of the storm. When the soap and brushes stopped and the rinse cycle of the car wash began I could see the road ahead and could see sunlight and dry land. Although the ‘rain’ was still beating down on my windshield I could see that up ahead it was sunny and dry. I would be able to take back the steering wheel, put the car in drive and go on my way. I watched closely, observing the signs and lights. There was a big bump at the end when the green light signaled the end of the ‘storm’ and that it was time for me to resume control and go on my way.

I feel that in my life now, too. That I can drive again, choose my roads and destination. Put my hands back on the steering wheel, take my life out of the neutral position and get back on the road. The storm is over and I can see clearly again. I believe that while the storms of life were raging and my view was obstructed I was being pulled along by an unseen force that guided me.

I learned to let go. Turn lose of the wheel. Know that the storm would pass. Toward the end I could see that although the ‘rain’ was still pounding there was clear sky up ahead. Now there are new highways and back roads to explore. New places to go and new routes to navigate. I just have to remember that sometimes I need to put it in neutral, let go the wheel and trust that I’ll come out the other side.

A statue representing Janus Bifrons in the Vatican Museum

January is named for Janus, the Roman mythological god of beginnings and transitions. The name is taken from ‘janua’ the Latin word for door. Crossing a doorway or threshold is symbolic of moving from one phase or one level to another. Janus, usually shown as a two-faced figure looks both to the future and the past.

The New Year, the start of January is a good time to evaluate the experiences, lessons and treasures from the past and decide what we will take with us into the new year.

A popular archetype in mythology and legends is the threshold guardian. This person or creature is posted at the gateway to a new level or phase of the hero’s journey. Its purpose is to test the hero and prove him or her worthy to cross the threshold into the new territory.

Have you ever noticed that once you proclaim your intention to start something new you’ll get a great opportunity related to what you are planning to leave or discontinue? For example, you decide that the time is right to leave your job and start the business you’ve been planning then you get a great job offer in the field you’ve just decided to leave. This gives you another opportunity to choose the safety of the career you know or break the ties and move toward your dream.

A fellow speaker and corporate trainer once told me that he was no longer going to speak on a certain topic that had been a stable of his business for years. He was heading in a new direction. The following week I learned that he had passed on a great opportunity to be interviewed for an article and get some good publicity on that old topic. I congratulated him on having faced the threshold guardian, confirming his dedication to his decision to redirect his business.

This January look at what the past year has given you that you want to take forward into the new year. Decide what things, situations, behaviors and yes–even people you want to leave behind. As you set your intentions for your new year be aware of any threshold guardians that appear to test your resolve. Know that facing them confirms that you’re ready to step into new territory. Backing down only means that you aren’t ready yet and need a little more preparation. Either option is just a part of your journey. YOUR journey. To be traveled your way.

On this threshold of the year 2012, like Janus I am looking both back at the past and forward to the future. I am grateful for the many friends and adventures of the previous year and look forward to new beginnings starting in January.

Happy New Year!

This year I resolve to:

1. Laugh more
2. Worry less
3. Pay attention
4. Encourage generously
5. Receive graciously
6. Listen lovingly
7. Advise sparingly
8. Imagine vastly
9. Welcome adventure
10. Embrace love